"Later as I was coming out, new Magic Tablet in hand, the people at the door shouted “Congratulations!” like I had just accomplished something of great importance inside. Instead of having simply purchased a rather pricey new toy for myself and my family, which is what I thought I had just done. I walked away wondering if perhaps it was true. If perhaps I now truly was a better person than most everyone else in the world, merely because I’d had five free hours on a Friday to sit in a lawn chair in front of a suburban shopping center.

My wife has assured me I am not."